lawrence family shoot

i've never done a maternity shoot before, so this was a combination of an experiment / baby shower gift for my friends justin, christy and their son mark. christy is about 33ish weeks pregnant with a boy -- we've been waiting a long time for little evan :)

it helps having such a ridiculously good looking family to photograph {and a glowing mom-to-be}, but i think the fact that we had a lot of fun also comes through in the pics x

hello little olive bun

i was so privileged to spend the morning with the practically brand new {5 day old} olivia van lieshout who was born to two wonderful parents, gary and chelsea, this last week. 

they were gracious enough to let me take some pics, and i am completely in awe of this beautiful little babe. chels fell pregnant while i was in the states, and there was a possibility i would not have been back for her birth, but i am so glad that i am back home, and that i get to witness this lovely little baby grow into a beautiful little girl and more.

congratulations gaz and chels, you could not be more blessed. love love love x

cheese in a can: washington/virginia edition

i had the coolest long weekend with two american sisters, susan and mary {who my parents hosted in 2010 when they came to south africa for bruce and hlomphs' wedding}. we've stayed in touch, and it's been one of my highest priorities to see them while in the usa.

i was not disappointed :) we all met up in virginia and then roadtripped to washington. so here's the cheese in a can summary of the trip:

turbulence and the fear that i would lose my lunch {and dignity} to a brown paper bag.
so much excitement to see susan.
norfolk airport -- that has way too many indoor plants.
awesome shopping and lovely things at forever 21. and {finally} h&m.
guacamole at chilis.
meeting jackie o -- susan's amazing mom.
pancakes a la jackie.
getting an awesome, much needed haircut from sara at super cuts.
picking up mary j at the airport.
finally meeting olivia, the most loveliest baby {and susan's niece} this side of the atlantic.
roadtripping to dc {trying and failing to hold my breath going through the 3 mile undersea tunnel. it was ambitious, i know}.
driving past the pentagon and giant "octopus monument". twice. cause the gps is lame.
amazing hotel {still in virginia though, ten mins from washington}
catching the subway for the first time in the usa. sheesh, it's tough to understand the first time. think i got the hang of it.
dodgy smells in the shadows of the underground.
chinatown. and dinner at nandos. what an awesome surprise. and the food was pretty good too, almost as cool as south africa.
it's c-c-c-cold in washington. brrrr. but a welcome change from the 40 degree heat in texas.
raining in washington. again, a welcome change in weather.
too many giggles with two awesome girls. i swear mary, you crack me up.
breakfast bagels and lattes at starbucks before venturing off on our washington exploratory adventure.
mary not being the best navigator. susan and i firing mary as the navigator.
walking. walking. walking.
the lincoln memorial. really impressive.
the drained reflective pool that's just dirt due to renovations. not too impressive.
loads of asian tourists.
photo bombing asian tourist group photos.
the korean memorial. haunting.
posing by our countries engraved in the marble. fun :)
the einstein memorial and soggy bottoms. and more ridiculous laughter.
the washington monument.
the whitehouse.
super expensive lunch at the museum of american history. 140 south african bucks. sheesh. can you say, rip off in american english?
first lady inaugural dress exhibition.
the ruby slippers from the wizard of oz.
the first muppet puppets.
the first flag -- the star spangled banner. it really gives you goosebumps.
farrah fawcett's famous red swimsuit.
the museum of natural history. so, so, so cool. you can't help but imagine scenes from night at the museum. i would freak out if any of those things came alive at night.
the hope diamond.
a real life mummy. well, a dead one. but a real one.
the capitol.
the smithsonian institute.
back at the hotel and crashing. wow. we must have walked 5 miles.
great italian dinner at piola.
"we're on vacation" susan newman.
late night krispy kremes from safeway pharmacy.
breakfast at brooklyn bagel.
arlington cemetery.
the changing of the guard at the tomb of the unknown soldier.
jfk and jackie o's grave site.
so many tombstones. it's quite overwhelming.
the iwa jima memorial {in the rain}.
cracker barrel. and dumplings. meh. not my fave.
sleeping for 3 hours. i am the best back seat driver on any roadtrip -- i sleep most of the way.
more shopping. love these girls :)
krispy kreme hot doughnuts. we made a point of going when the red light was on. and they really do melt in your mouth.
laughing at youtube videos.
virginia beach. it was soul-fulfilling seeing the ocean again.
funny photos with fake shells and neptune statues.
more starbucks.
mexican. surrounded by sailors {virginia has 5 naval bases}.
saying farewell to jackie o.
more shopping. yes yes yes!
"you is kind. you is smart. you is important." {somewhere there is a video, that may make it onto facebook}

trying to cram all my stuff into two carry-on bags. after breaking a sweat, almost pulling my hamstring and bursting several blood vessels i achieved success. {i refuse to pay $25 to check in a bag}.
farewells at norfolk airport. so sad to have to say good bye to my american sisters.
but...already planning future vacations and adventures.
 

x

cheese in a can: austin edition

oh my hat! it has been far too long since i added austin to my "cheese in a can" list of observations and experiences. it's a long list, hope you find it an interesting read -- you may have to take a break half way. can you believe i have been in the live music capital of the world for three months? what a ride. i love this city. full of art, music, culture and yes, weirdness. the city's motto is "keep austin weird". and people really, really do.

enjoy :)

giant guitars on the baggage carousel. welcome to austin!
quality time with my mad awesome cousin.
true blood at jo's on sunday nights.
willie nelson blvd.
free itunes downloads from starbucks. i heart freebies.
new music -- cold war kids, motopony, airborne toxic event, boxer rebellion.
taking the bus.
crazies in the bus :(
keep austin weird {word!}

lake travis.
40+ degree heat everyday.
long hot days at the pool.
volunteering.
colleagues who are now dear friends.
info sessions with prospective clients.
butterflies and accelerated heart beats {you may or may not be in on the secret}
press releases.
rain! {for 5 mins}
don't mess with texas.
greyhound. meh.
half a kings of leon gig. so, would that be 500mb?
dallas cowboys stadium. wow.
amazing generosity from strangers who are now friends.
partying on sixth street.
$5 pitchers of alcohol.
international students from paris, copenhagen, turkey, mexico and sydney.
amazing boutiques on 2nd street.

fredericksburg.
blisters :(
sunny, the amazing nigerian cab driver and my new homey.
kabomba -- awesome band who jammed at stubbs.
henry and the invisibles. also at stubbs, a one man band. cool name :)
networking. networking. networking.
whole foods. closest thing to woolworths. ahhh happiness.
starbucks and frapps in the morning. makes up for waking up at 5:30am.
waterloo records -- amazing music store since 1982.
the international food aisle at h.e.b is awesome -- marie biscuits and cadburys.

 such awesome fellowship and soul-refreshing worship and teaching at grace covenant church. it really feels like home, far away from home.
green.
organic.
old classic movies.
hopdoddy {organic} burgers with asal.
packages from home. mama sunshine you bring light into my life.
annie's cafe and free groupons.
art cinemas.
outlet malls -- 60-70% off designer brands. eeeep!
tax free weekend -- yes please!
the coolest skype call to a certain barndance with a front row view :)
austin city limits fest 3 day pass! i have amazing parents.
bon iver tickets!
loving that all the rad bands come to austin, don't have to go anywhere for cool music
drive thru starbucks. drive thru atms. drive thru post office. drive thru laundromat. drive thru pharmacy. sheesh. 

san antonio and the alamo. kind of haunting, really.
"pumped up kicks" -- my song of the summer.
watching world cup rugby at fados.
wishing more than anything to be at the johnston's wedding :(

jadey sending photos of everyone at the reception and making me feel a part of it :)
flags at half mast for 9/11 ten year anniversary
humbled by generous friends. speechlessness.
bon iver!!!!! ahhh, so much of amazingness.
so much birthday love -- too blessed for words.
flowers delivered to the door, all the way from maritzburg. thank you nancy and dean barber :)
birthday dinner at sandra bullock's restaurant. pity she wasn't there ;) but the company was still a-class!
austin city limits: three days of music, flu and oh maybe a billion people.

meeting a professional festival photographer -- and getting to use his super cool lens :) {it was the size of my arm and weighed a ton but so much fun to play around with}
coldplay! eeeeep!
stevie wonder. meh.
fleet foxes. eeeeep!
gillian welch. meh.
cold war kids. eeeep!
so homesick :( and fluish. pity party deluxe.
seeing 6 weeks of planning and team work come together for the 20x20 event. so much fun and so proud my girls narda and asal. go team austin!
publishing clients stories and seeing their gratitude, one client was moved to tears when he read what i wrote. wow. what an honour.
pecan street festival and buying amazing artwork from the artist himself.
more world cup rugby.
editing pics for photo comps. hold thumbs!
bonding with the p'nut {pronounced puh-noot} the audacious {it's a black cat for those who may not be acquainted with his winning personality and loving charm. he sometimes sleeps on my bed}
so grateful for good things happening in the lives of those i love. much to rejoice. 

x

what awesome days are made of...

i have incredible people in my life. fact. 

today i received the most wonderful package in the post. it took a long time to get to me, but the timing could not have been better {i needed this today of all days}. all the way from cold, wintery south africa came a "getting ready for winter love box" from my "other mom", whom i fondly call mama sunshine.

it includes a south african flag beanie and scarf, knitted winter socks {not just for me but for my cousin and her daughter}, a local magazine featuring the wedding of a south african to a royal {such a nice touch!} and of course the best chocolate in the whole world -- peppermint crisp, cadbury's and aero. oh yum! but the loveliest part was a letter and a hand made beaded bookmark for my bible.

here are some pics :)

wow, i am so loved.

x

lessons from oprah

so my next blog post should technically be about new york, as i just spent 4 days there.

nah.

i want to dedicate this post to someone who means a great deal to me. it's not oprah. but oprah was a part of our friendship that has spanned 23 years. katrina {or katinks as i call her} met in pat kirk's ballet class when we were 6 years old. we did some sunday school together, missed primary school, connected in high school, separated at varsity and are still close friends two decades later.

it sounds morbid, but i often wonder what people would say about me at my funeral, and i hope people don't leave the sincere compliments for when i'm dead. so katinks, i want to honour you right now with a memory that oprah's last show sparked, a memory that made me laugh out loud and cry at the same time.

me, in a black afro wig, in your mom's teal satin blouse and bracken high dri-mac slow mo running to paul simon singing the theme song for the 1996 season of oprah. ten years come and gone so fast i might as well be dreaming. we were tasked to produce a video for visual literacy and we chose oprah. {i think jacqui grant was also in our group?} maybe because i could fake an american accent. or because graham {my brother} did a great nelson mandela impersonation we could use in a "telephonic interview". but we did this absolutely crazy random shoot and ended up with a video that no one else found funny or entertaining. we thought it was pure oscar genius :) it's so rad how you were still friends with me in my worst moments. and being a white oprah was not the worst, believe me. i still hope that video has been destroyed by mold and moth.

that, was 15 years ago. and still, though we have not lived on the same continent for 2 years, i count you as one of my most precious gifts. things are different now, but not much has changed.

thanks for mtv music videos, teaching me how to smoke a cigarette, gladwrap slimming secrets, explaining me back to myself when i didn't make sense and life was even more nonsensical, for getting lost with me in greece, laughing at my lame jokes, spoems, hours and hours and hours of long conversations, introducing me to pashminas, always pointing me to the high road and encouraging me to be the bigger person, getting me employed at the bank {which was pivotal in leading me exactly where i am right now}, explaining the mi pack and an income statement to me {algebra in matric and nii in credit card} and for always being my number one cheerleader, advocate and voice of reason.

you are the most generous and selfless person i know. i have never known you to say a harsh word, neither to a person nor behind their back. you love so completely and without condition. you treat everyone with respect and dignity. you are fair and uphold justice and defend your values no matter what the circumstance. you believe in the best in people and this doesn't make you naive, in fact we need more of you in this world.

i miss you. i am grateful for you. and i look forward to many, many, many, many, many more seasons of life together.

oprah's 25 years may have come and gone, but i'm still in this. til we're grannies in greencross shoes. with awesome pink pashminas x

joy in unexpected places

while i really am a control freak, i love spontaneity {i think because it makes me realise that not everything should be planned}. my whole day yesterday was spontaneous.

i'm feeling super fragile about a lot of things right now, my state of equilibrium has been rattled in many ways {which is a good lesson that i am still processing and will blog about soon}. but for now i really want to honour the sacredness and supportiveness of friends. i don't know if they will ever really know how much i value and appreciate them...how much sushi, being outside in the sun and chocolate macademia lattes really mean to me.

so, since you do RSS my blog {and yes, i am slowly figuring out these techie things} you will know who you are.
x

eleven from '10

every year i write myself a letter. i wrote my first letter in 1997 when i was 15. i did not fully comprehend the significance of that year, until much later. 2006 in fact. i know this because it’s all recorded in A4 lined pages of my own handwriting. no one has ever read these letters. they are by far the most honest, intimate and victorious accounts of the last 13 years of my life. there have been many moments of wisdom in letters from 7 years ago, that offer me comfort and solutions to problems i face now. it’s pretty weird :)

there are some rules. i seal them for a full year. they have to be in my own writing, not typed and printed. i write as if no one will ever read them {i once wrote a letter as if i were writing for someone else to read -- it was pretty insincere and lifeless. the best letters are the no-holds-barred ones}. people who hurt me only get one line. this is to remind me that you can never avoid heartache, but you should never dwell on it.

so i won’t ever publish my letters, i will most likely take them to my grave with me, but i will post eleven lessons from 2010 that i included in my letter from last year:

one. i can survive cancer scares, scathing rumours, heartbreak, loss, smash & grabs, retrenchments, bad bosses and being on my own.
two. my hair does not have to be perfect all the time {it looks better when it’s not}.
three. family is the most important and profound human connection we have on this planet.
four. perception is reality. if you are a hammer, everything is a nail. it just sucks when you’re the nail.
five. it is the worst betrayal when people i trust let me down. but i will continue to trust anyway.
six. exercise is the best vitamin/medicine/pick me up/sleeping pill/energy tonic.
seven. i don’t always have to have a plan. i need to be less boring and predictable. i have to make more mistakes and take more risks. life will be more fun that way.
eight. i need to work on my self-perception. getting older helps with this, you stress less about the lame stuff.
nine. GOD will never give up on me. He fights for me each day and loves me fiercely. His love changes me. if i ever truly understood it, i would live differently.
ten. my close friends are the most valuable asset i have in my life. i am in awe of their love and support in my darkest moments. they keep me sane and humble and able to laugh through tears.
eleven. everyone has a story. we just need to stop and listen to it. there is a magic in storytelling, the real kind. fairy tales have nothing on real life.

2010 may have left me bruised, but not broken. 2010 was a year of coming apart, falling away, a “tearing”. 2011 will be a year of “convergence”, seeing a bigger plan come together in a big way. to adventures and memoirs and stories i will tell my grandchildren -- and they will look up at me in disbelief and say “no way, gran, you were super cool when you were younger”.

that’s all
x

_2010 in pictures_136 seconds of memories

{you can click on the image to enlarge it, and then zoom in for a closer look}

not so self portrait pt. 3

this is my good friend carl. his nose was broken playing squash -- not in a bar fight {he's not aggressive} or doing something massively life-threatening. just squash :) i love this pic because it's so raw...driving around at 1am, smoking a cigar, with a bandaged broken face...

{thanks for posing for me. you're a legend x}

a touch of something lovely

i've finally started to put up things in my new house that are very personal, and that make me smile. i've had a few little loose things in boxes and bags and found this really special birthday letter from a friend of mine roan, whom i love dearly and who inspires me to live and love better. roan has a way of making simple things beautiful and meaningful, and his birthday message to me in clear black ink on a lovely apple green piece of paper (now stuck on my door to read every day) a year ago was this:

never let fear, doubt or any other obstacle stand in your way. if there's something you want, fight for it with all your heart.

i intend to rolo. i intend to.
x

not so self portrait pt. 2

i have been sentimentally looking through all my photos, from the last 4 years (around 18,000 of them. oh no, i'm not kidding) and discovered some more portrait pics that i liked. now, if you know jason then you'll get this pic. this was taken at a village in mansa, zambia in july 2007. jay's currently teaching english in south korea, and this photo makes me miss him so much and want to hang out and laugh and talk about life with him.

that's what photographs can do.

not so self portrait pt. 1

ok so i am on a mission to take good photos. photos that capture moments and people and places. so every now and then when i feel like i've done any one of the above, i'll post it. this is my friend tim, who i had to beg to let me photograph him (he's usually behind the lens...check out some of his work) and it took at least 10 photos before i got my shot.

he's pretty amazing in front of the lens too :)

laughing from the belly

i just came home from spending time with a good friend. there's something about having known someone for so long that your history just uncomplicates your time together. the conversation is so fluid and the silences are not uncomfortable and there is a different kind of laughter that you share. til tears stream down your face and your belly hurts and you can't get enough air into your lungs.
you're hysterical.
you giggle.
you laugh at yourself.
embarrassing and awkward moments you never thought you'd get over.
secret movie star obsessions.
i love those times.
they fill my heart with so much joy.

that's all. good night x