i am in love. it's not a joke. if i had my way, we would be together for ever. but it's not possible now. and this boy, this love of my life, has made me realise that while i would rescue him from abandonment, that i would take him home and love him forever, i cannot give him what he needs. i cannot be a mom now and trying to be a single mom would be the most unfair decision for him.
and it's like that with so many things in my life right now. i can see what i want, desires of my heart that are noble, but i can't get there because it's not the right time. and wow am i impatient. but GOD in his infinite wisdom is showing me that in quietness and trust is my strength. this picture of Jarred reminds me of that every time.
i wonder if he'll ever know that at 4 months old, he taught me a powerful lesson.
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