merry christmas to all, and to all a good night

there is something about Christmas that we miss. i woke up today with such a joy. my last day of work for the year. having my brother home. excited to share in the gift-giving, thinking about the presents i'd wrapped up for people i love to open on Christmas day, piled up under my very cool tree with very cool decorations {pictured above -- i couldn't resist}. and just really remembering what this is all about. the real reason why we celebrate. i mean i don't feel like we celebrate properly. we eat. we laugh. we share in family time. but i just don't feel like we really party it up like we should, celebrating the birthday of a saviour. a king. a redeemer.

i love the song hark the herald angels sing, particularly these lines:

mild he lays his glory by. born that man no more may die. born to raise the sons of earth. born to give them second birth. hark! the herald angels sing "glory to the newborn king!"

whoever you are, wherever you are, i pray that you feel the LOVE that was big enough to be born small enough to save our world.

that's all
x

love’s confusing joy

i’ve come across some really rad quotes by the poet rumi, who lived in 13th-century persia, known as the poet of love. i first heard a quote by him in a movie {not that academic, i know} that went something like this “all we really want is love’s confusing joy”. he’s pretty legit. and i discovered that mr david crowder also takes inspiration from his works, you may recognise these words…

dance, when you’re broken open.
dance, if you’ve torn the bandage off.
dance in the middle of the fighting.
dance in your blood.
dance, when you’re perfectly free.

or maybe this…

that which GOD said to the rose,
and caused it to laugh in full-blown beauty,
he said to my heart,
and made it a hundred times more beautiful.
what was whispered to the rose
to break it open
last night
was whispered to my heart.

but i especially liked this:

love is reckless; not reason.
reason seeks a profit.
having died of self-interest,
love risks everything and asks for nothing.

x

quotable quote

"africa can stun you in an instant. it can throw floods and drought and disease at you, sometimes all at the same time. in the next moment, it will tease you with its magnificent beauty, so even if you don't forget, you can find a way to forgive. ultimately, it keeps you coming back for more."

{jacqueline novogratz, the blue sweater}

easy. like sunday morning.

my favourite day of the week is sunday. i love waking up early and not having anything planned. at first, living by myself was disquieting. i really struggled to get used to how quiet everything was, especially in the mornings. i was used to the noise of others: voices, dogs, showers, the radio, the telephone ringing. but now it's really rad. i like the quietness. and i find i enjoy the really simple things like great coffee and danish biscuits in bed on a sunday morning. watching movies on my mac. only getting out of my pjs at 3pm :)

the stolen heart

i bought a beautiful book a while ago called "classic love poems" hoping i could become more cultured and i started reading it last night. all the great poets are there…marlowe, byron, shakespeare, keats, yeats and wordsworth. i came across "the stolen heart" by john suckling and it really touched my heart...

"but love is such a mystery,
i cannot find it out;
for when i think i'm best resolved
i then am most in doubt"

{the stolen heart -- sir john suckling}

x

quotable quote

i love donald miller. i was catching up on his blog today and came across this post entitled the joy of getting older:

"i wish i could go back and talk to myself when i was twenty. i'd say to myself "listen, don't worry about the things you've been worrying about. everything is going to work out great." and i'd likely clarify with myself that "in the future i get everything i need?" and i'd say back to myself, "no, you just realise you didn't need it. and that's even better."

{donald miller}

x

self portrait: expressiveness

i'm often told i'm really expressive. and people frequently laugh at my animated-ness. i do it without realising. so i figured i'd try capture that in a single multiple-self-portrait. and this way i have a willing subject {myself} to practice some lighting and effects. plus, if you randomly {and perhaps unfortunately} come across my blog, you can know what i look like. sort of. my normal un-expressive face is a lot less interesting :)

cerebral implosion

i'm here at what we call the glc which is the bank's training grounds, doing a leadership programme. we're here the whole week, sunday to friday and you stay over at the on site hotel. it's super intense though, and we're only on day 2 and my brain is so tired. but i have learnt a few things about myself that i need to re-calibrate.

one. i am not ready to hit the books for an mba or pdm anytime soon. i am really study unfit.
two. i can contribute meaningfully to a classroom discussion around themes like strategy. so i've learnt a lot in my short tenure in the bank. but i have far to go :)
three. i have no self disclipline when it comes to the unbelievable food here. wow. french toast for breakfast everyday is heaven for me.
four. i feel an intense guilt being here, especially given the recent retrenchments.
five. i am not that bad at meeting new people and holding my own in what can sometimes be awkward conversations with work people {a situation i usually avoid like the plague}
six. strategy and finance are really fascinating and i'm loving the content. but i still believe i am being called to something outside of banking. and there have been so many confirmations of this {including a case study on grameen bank in our session yesterday -- what a cool surprise!}

anyway. i'm going to crash now. been a long day and have a hectic {but hopefully interesting} day ahead tomorrow.

that's all
x

congruence

so the weirdest thing happened to me on sunday. it was all rainy outside so i decided to breakfast in bed and watch a dvd i bought “he’s just not that into you” – chick flick deluxe, right. but the movie that played was not chick flick deluxe, it was “inkheart”. not even the same genre. turns out it’s a nationwide stock problem, seems someone burnt the wrong movie to dvd. oops.

so it was a bit of a random disappointment {well, inkheart was pretty fun actually} but it got me thinking about something. i think that’s what a lot of people are like. their dvd cover is one thing. even their dvd disk label is one thing. but the movie they show is something else altogether. and i have to apply that to myself too. but i really want to have congruence. i remember that term very clearly from communication studies at varsity. a lack of congruence leads to conflict, and i'm really on a mission to simplify my life, including making sure that inside matches out. it's just easier than keeping track of some kind of facade. i want to be honest. i want to be real. i want to be sincere. i want to fully love GOD and love people.

congruence eliminates conflict.

that's all x

not everything is going to be the way you think it ought to be

i tend to archive my life to music. so for example, i got sheryl crow's tuesday night music club for an absolute steal at R49 over the weekend. now the first time i heard this album, it was on a cassette tape {anyone remember those??} in 1995. I was 12, had braces, a dorky hairstyle and had no idea what lay ahead of me. it was before high school, varsity, work, bad experiences, broken hearts, car repayments, the pressure and responsibility of a home loan. i think my only real concern was how cool i was to my friends and how high my marks were. i had no idea what i was in for. but i remember listening to tuesday night music club, memorising the words, thinking i had a grasp of what sheryl was actually singing about. 15 years later {i still remember all the lyrics} but i have a better idea i think.

i've had track 11 on repeat for three days {"i shall believe"} and i have to post the lyrics. it's a song of repentance i think. coming back to someone or something you can believe in. i get goosebumps every time i hear it.

then. now. and even 15 years from now when i'm 43 *gasp* -- it will still be relevant.

come to me now
and lay your hands over me
even if it's a lie
say it will be alright
and i shall believe
i'm broken in two
and i know you're on to me
that i only come home
when i'm so all alone
but i do believe

that not everything is gonna be the way
you think it ought to be
it seems like every time i try to make it right
it all comes down on me
please say honestly you won't give up on me
and i shall believe
and i shall believe

open the door
and show me your face tonight
i know it's true
no one heals me like you
and you hold the key
never again would i turn away from you
i'm so heavy tonight
but your love is alright
and i do believe

that not everything is gonna be the way
you think it ought to be
it seems like every time i try to make it right
it all comes down on me
please say honestly
you won't give up on me
and I shall believe
i shall believe
and i shall believe

§

that's all x

sugar highs

everyone has a movie or song or book that they can watch or listen to or read a hundred times and never, ever get over it. you always appreciate something new each time you re-visit. that's what empire records is like for me. there are too many great scenes {"sinead o' rebellion...shock me shock me with that deviant behaviour" or the epic scene where renee zellweger sings the final verse of sugar high}, an incredible soundtrack and a secret part of me that wishes i was cool enough to work there and rock out to rad music. but it's also about giving people a second chance when they don't deserve it and how people really come together to save something meaningful.

so i'm re-visiting tonight. chilling on my couch. eating ice cream x

under threat

i really thought we were beyond the recession. in my career {a very short one so far} in banking i have only known the downturn in the financial services sector. i joined 6 months prior to the national credit act, when all banks were in the credit rush to offer you a card and/or a limit increase. we all did it, no finger-pointing here, please.

i signed off system changes when prime hit 15.5% and credit impairments shot through the roof. i reviewed market analysis and press articles rife with images of people cutting up their credit cards. i read with dismay how 1 million people lost their jobs in the peak of the "w" recession, how 3 of the big four banks retrenched. how one bank became the biggest second hand car dealer due to the number of monthly repossessions. i attended countless presentations on how 2010 will revive the markets, boost morale and give us the revitalisation we need to skip off the meniscus of the recession ocean.

and i thought we were through the worst of it. but we aren't. now there will be retrenchments. now there's name calling. duplication. a little bit of fat here, there. panic. defense. black. white. pale male. incompetence. last in, first out. streamlining. back to basics. budget forecasting. we forget we deal with people, not processes. we forget we deal with dads, not duplicated managerial roles. single moms with kids to feed.

yes, i have never known any other climate than this.
but this has to be the lowest point in my career.

but i am not my job description.
i am not my salary grade.
i am not my latest performance appraisal score.
i am not my key result area.

i simply trust in the great I AM.

i heart hunting for treasure

i love the new mr price tv ad with sarah the photographer. here are some screen shots of the vid, and you can watch it here i just love how she explains what she does as "a treasure hunter" x

and more blue sweaterness

some more awesome quotes from such a great book:

"from then on, constance became a great storyteller for our new organisation, helping wealthy and poor alike understand the power of giving each individual the tools of credit so {they} would have the potential to change {their own lives}. "we are not handing out gifts," she would say, "but are bringing forth the gifts inside the people themselves"."

and then some lessons learned:

"i learned the importance of giving different kinds of people seats at the table early {in the process of establishing a microfinance organisation} in order to bring ideas to reality."

and then my fave quote:

"i didn't fathom then that most big dreams originate in someone's living room, with a small group of people, regardless of where they come from, or how they are dressed."

not so self portrait pt. 3

this is my good friend carl. his nose was broken playing squash -- not in a bar fight {he's not aggressive} or doing something massively life-threatening. just squash :) i love this pic because it's so raw...driving around at 1am, smoking a cigar, with a bandaged broken face...

{thanks for posing for me. you're a legend x}

defined by mistake

recently someone posted this quote as their status on facebook: “you can't let your mistakes define you” and i’ve really been thinking about it these past few days. i mean, my mistakes do define me. they actually should. because if i learn a lesson from messing up, i get better. i learn more. and i mess up less. i am probably more defined and refined by the things i did wrong than the things i did right. in fact, my mistakes are more often the precursor to my achievements than the other way around.

when i say hurtful things and need to apologise for breaking someone down, i define how to build them up.
when i make the wrong choice about someone romantically, i define who i should be falling in love with in the future.
when i make a bad business decision at work, i define how to build better strategies.
when i do something out of pride and see the destructive consequence, i define how to live by humility.

whenever i bump my head, stumble, screw up, falter, make a bad call, it should make me better.

that’s all.

x

quotable quote

i love this quote...

"how monotonous the sounds of the forest would be if the music came only from the top ten birds."

{dan bennett}

the death of a part of me

so the title of this post may be melodramatic, but my camera died on me yesterday, and it was the worst feeling.

i felt so lost. i was in a mini-hell because i was surrounded by awesome picture-moments with nothing to capture them with. i was not a happy bunny.

it actually made me realise how much i live my life through a lens. and how addicted i am to getting that "great shot". i haven't quite figured out if it's a good or a bad thing.

anyway. sigh. so now i think i may have to finally upgrade to a dslr. gosh. it's not a bad thing. my credit card statement won't be too stoked though.

i am totally open to donations to the caron canon philanthropic fund......

more blue sweater-ness

so i've been reading the blue sweater and i already have emphatically underlined meaningful quotes that challenge or resonate with me:

"i didn't want to become old at 35 and knew instinctively that a combination of service and adventure could lead to a life of passion and constant renewal."

and then later on she writes:

"why would i give up the chance at making it {at a career in banking}? i admitted the title had a nice ring to it and a small part of me feared risking my career and giving up my job title. but the promise of adventure and making a real difference had always been the internal force driving me. and there's no time like the present to start living your dream".

jacqueline is my hero. and i'm only like 20 pages in...good times ahead x

things will be great (they already are)

so today i turned 28. i don't feel 28. when people ask my age i always have to stop myself and think about it, i want to say "23" because i don't feel like time has really passed that quickly. i heard this song in the credits of the drew barrymore/ellen paige film "whip it" and there are elements that are really appropriate (especially the part about last year's clothes not fitting haha) i thought i'd make it my birthday post:

here it comes.
guess for years i have tried to calm
what's inside me but something's wrong.
i don't know what to say
to give me away.

and there's the first mistake
i tried not to make.
next time i'm around that's a habit to break
when i turn 28.
things are gonna be great at 28.

they said that i would get used to the change
but i can't keep my eyes on the page.
shouldn't be writing these songs at my age.
the candle's lit
waiting patient for me to sit,
but none of last year's clothes still fit,
and i keep waiting for you to enter the room.
i made my wish let me give it to you
when i turn 28.
things are gonna be great at 28.

at 28, tell everyone they'll just have to wait
when i turn 29.
things are gonna be fine at 29.

-- Lorene Scafaria


celebrate the fact that you are were born and are alive EVERYDAY.
enjoy the love that others share with you EVERYDAY.
embrace the gifts that people want to give you EVERYDAY.
{from the small to the big, the extravagant to the handmade simple ones}
rejoice EVERYDAY.
x

blue sweater

there are very few people that i have heard speak who have moved me with their charisma and conviction. i saw jacqueline speak on TED and i could not believe that people like her exist in this world. i remember closing my mac and just sat thinking about it all, kind of stunned at the magnitude of knowing we all have a deep power within us to be used in ways that will change the world. the thought kept me captive for hours, days and now weeks. her story started with a blue sweater. so i ordered her book online and it arrived today (yayness!). i am so stoked. it's all part of writing a better story -- reading a great one.

blank pages

so after reading miller's a million miles and deciding i want to write a better story with my life, i bought something to write my story in. i really want to travel, a lot, and i have so many places i want to see, so i bought myself a travel journal.

ja it's kind of nerdy, but there's something about having a very cool-looking travel journal with blank boring pages that makes me want to fill them.
actually purchasing the air ticket will be the next step. promise! x

a touch of something lovely

i've finally started to put up things in my new house that are very personal, and that make me smile. i've had a few little loose things in boxes and bags and found this really special birthday letter from a friend of mine roan, whom i love dearly and who inspires me to live and love better. roan has a way of making simple things beautiful and meaningful, and his birthday message to me in clear black ink on a lovely apple green piece of paper (now stuck on my door to read every day) a year ago was this:

never let fear, doubt or any other obstacle stand in your way. if there's something you want, fight for it with all your heart.

i intend to rolo. i intend to.
x

miller and me

donald miller rocks my world. in fact he sometimes turns it upside down. it's not often you encounter such a great writer, with such great stories. he writes in such a way that you feel like you're having a conversation with him, over coffee, just listening to him for hours. never getting bored. and he speaks with a profound honesty and simplicity. i'm just finishing off a million miles in a thousand years (read it. now. seriously) and i wrote down some quotes that really stabbed at my heart.

"fear is a manipulative emotion that can trick us into living a boring life." pg. 108

"there is a force resisting the beautiful things in the world, and too many of us are giving in.
The world needs for us to have courage.
The world needs for us to write something better." pg. 118

he inspires me to want to live a better story with my life.
watch this space.
things are going to be changing in a big way.
very soon.
an inciting incident.
a character arc.
positive and negative turns.

i'm stoked.

basking

we're going into summer in south africa. i love summers here. i love the dark, powerful, thunderous storms that seem to come out of nowhere, rolling cumulonimbus clouds that swell and explode with rain that plunders into the ground, and then disappear within seconds. i love the long, sweltering hot days. and i love to bask in that sunshine.

i love the word "bask". it means to enjoy, take satisfaction in, or to expose yourself to a "pleasant warmth".

after the day i had today, i am basking in the glow of answered prayer. GOD intervened in such a powerful way today. he took a situation i thought was impossible, and made it more than possible, he made it abundant. he did imaginably more than all i could ask or imagine. where i thought i needed to sacrifice and make a tough choice, he gave me everything i needed.

he is so gracious. his will is divine. he is the beginning and the end. everything i will ever need. and he loves me, and proves this over and over and over and over.

not so self portrait pt. 2

i have been sentimentally looking through all my photos, from the last 4 years (around 18,000 of them. oh no, i'm not kidding) and discovered some more portrait pics that i liked. now, if you know jason then you'll get this pic. this was taken at a village in mansa, zambia in july 2007. jay's currently teaching english in south korea, and this photo makes me miss him so much and want to hang out and laugh and talk about life with him.

that's what photographs can do.

not so self portrait pt. 1

ok so i am on a mission to take good photos. photos that capture moments and people and places. so every now and then when i feel like i've done any one of the above, i'll post it. this is my friend tim, who i had to beg to let me photograph him (he's usually behind the lens...check out some of his work) and it took at least 10 photos before i got my shot.

he's pretty amazing in front of the lens too :)

18 month old giggles

there is just something about a child's laughter and joy in little things that fascinates me. this photo was taken today when my cousin david started blowing bubbles at ciaran, my other cousin's 18 month old son. hands down, totally unbiased, this is the cutest kid in the world.

fact.

daily dose of calcium

i love m.i.l.k. photography.

you’ll know it, you usually see the cards and magnets in gift shops and the like. they capture people so well, something i always hope to do when i take pictures, mostly unsuccessfully. m.i.l.k. is an acronym for “moments of intimacy laughter and kinship”.

it’s grown into a global photographic competition and i just love looking through the galleries of “fresh m.i.l.k.” here are a few of my faves, but visit www.milkphotos.com for more loveliness.

boys who can shave

a friend posted this mark driscoll article on facebook, and it’s so good i had to share it:

the world today is filled with boys who can shave.

historically, a guy would go through two life phases: boy, then man. the transition from boy to man was comprised of five sociological variables that happened almost simultaneously or in very close succession: leave your parents’ home (Gen. 2:24); finish your education or vocational training; start a career-track job, not a dead-end-joe one; meet a woman, love her, honor her, court her, and marry her; have children with her.

but here’s what’s happened. rather than moving from boy to man by this succession of sociological transitions, we’ve created something called adolescence. it’s a third life stage in the middle between boy and man. we don’t know what to call them so we just call them “guys.” these are boys who can shave.

today, adolescence starts somewhere in the teen years and continues indefinitely. there is no foreseeable end. the problem with adolescence is guys don’t know when they’re ever going to grow up and be men, and no pressure is exerted on them to do so.

is it when you’re 16 and you can drive? or 18, when you can vote and join the military? or 21, when you can drink? is it when you graduate from college after you’ve worked on your undergrad degree for seven or eight years? is it when you get married? is it when you have kids? is it when you buy a house? no one knows. so, we are left with indefinite adolescence and a peter pan syndrome epidemic where men want to remain boys forever.

click on this link to read the rest of the article http://blog.marshillchurch.org/2010/08/21/the-world-is-filled-with-boys-who-can-shave/

awesome…it makes me want a man who can shave who will pursue me like a walrus even more.

pursued like a walrus

i was watching the documentary "arctic tale" and it was pretty amazing. not only the unbelievable cinematography (taken over a dedicated 10 years) and storytelling, but how strangely human the arctic animals are.

near the end of the film, selah (a walrus) has reached maturity and her tusks make her a pretty attractive female to the walrus males in the herd. in breeding season males apparently compete in hardcore vocal displays of guttural eerie sounding "songs". but she's fussy. so to win her affection one male walrus sings an underwater mating call for 50 hours. something in his tone attracts her and they "fall in love" and become mates.

wow. i can't imagine someone singing for me for 50 hours to win my heart. but i would like to be pursued with that kind of intensity :)

laughing from the belly

i just came home from spending time with a good friend. there's something about having known someone for so long that your history just uncomplicates your time together. the conversation is so fluid and the silences are not uncomfortable and there is a different kind of laughter that you share. til tears stream down your face and your belly hurts and you can't get enough air into your lungs.
you're hysterical.
you giggle.
you laugh at yourself.
embarrassing and awkward moments you never thought you'd get over.
secret movie star obsessions.
i love those times.
they fill my heart with so much joy.

that's all. good night x

lessons from post its

oh my gosh. i love making lists. i list everything. shopping lists. packing lists. action lists. wish lists. gift lists. positive vs. negative outcomes lists. then there’s post-its. mini lists. and i try to condense content into a smaller cm2 space (i like the challenge but ultimately end up writing all the way up the sides and eventually over onto the back which kind of defeats the point).

so in common terms my compulsive list-making makes me ocd. pedantic. hyper-organised. or whatever. someone once laughed at my list. i mean i’m sure he thought it was funny/quirky/strange, but it actually kind of hurt. and i wonder what it is that makes us so attached to these idiosyncrasies inherent in us. i guess we don’t think it’s strange until someone points it out and then we feel totally abnormal. like we may as well have a big green broccoli stem sticking out of our left cheek.

but where would i be without my big green broccoli? it’s who i am. it makes me happy and feel like i’m in control and able to get all this stuff in my life done, and not forget anybody or anything. it doesn’t hurt anyone. but when my big green broccoli actually makes someone else feel bad, it’s not good. so if i try to control people and condense them into little purple 3M post-its...it’s a big problem. if i try bullet-point them into my life and action items for the day, it’s a big problem.

i doubt JESUS ever made a list. i doubt he had an orange post it on his carpenter’s bench reminding him to love people. to share with them. to pray with them. to remember important things about them that are important to them. and i believe GOD made me kind of quirky with my list-making, but he also wants to make me more like his SON. and to live and love more like him.

sometimes i wish lacuna inc. was real

i love the movie eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. if you haven't seen it, you should. if you plan to, then stop reading this now because i will spoil the ending...it tells the story of joel and clementine who fall in love on a train to new york, despite the fact that they are completely different they are inexplicably drawn to each other, it's like magnetism.

the crazy thing is that they are actually former lovers, who were together for two years. after the break up, clementine visited a company called "lacuna inc." to have every memory of joel erased from her mind, successfully. when joel learns of this he is totally devastated, and does the same. most of the film is told in joel's subconscious as each memory of clementine is consumed by a dark nothingness and he struggles to keep her alive in these memory-dreams.

the irony of the film is that even though you to try to erase someone from your mind, you can't erase them from your heart. and that destiny or fate or whatever will ultimately bring you back together. like you can't deny love. so in a way, it conquers even our weak attempts to fight it.

pretty cool eh?

falling in love

i am in love. it's not a joke. if i had my way, we would be together for ever. but it's not possible now. and this boy, this love of my life, has made me realise that while i would rescue him from abandonment, that i would take him home and love him forever, i cannot give him what he needs. i cannot be a mom now and trying to be a single mom would be the most unfair decision for him.

and it's like that with so many things in my life right now. i can see what i want, desires of my heart that are noble, but i can't get there because it's not the right time. and wow am i impatient. but GOD in his infinite wisdom is showing me that in quietness and trust is my strength. this picture of Jarred reminds me of that every time.

i wonder if he'll ever know that at 4 months old, he taught me a powerful lesson.

Just a small puncture

i have had a slow puncture for months. like i won't even lie, it's been that long. and like a true lazy ass, i just keep pumping it up, living in denial that i need to get it fixed. until one day recently it was totally flat so i pulled into a garage to get it sorted. i observed as they repaired the old tyre (cause i always secretly wanted to be a mechanic hard core repair type person) and it was fascinating.

so here's what he did...first he put the tyre into a huge basin of water and slowly rotated it, carefully and methodically in order to find the pin sized hole. he was so patient. then he took a massive corkscrew looking tool and rammed it so hard into the tyre i thought he was going to rip it open. the air escaped with such rapidity and a loud whoosh i remember thinking well he's just making it worse (silly nana) . then he threaded a small strip i can only describe as droewors or a cabonossi stick (but smaller) into a giant needle and shoved this into the hole. plugged up. no more whoosh of escaping air. 30 bucks later i'm back on the road. and i'm thinking there are some real parallels here to real life.

we all have slow punctures or wounds we don't want to face. and then GOD in his quiet patience slowly finds where the bubbles are escaping. and then he makes the hole bigger, so we know exactly where the pain is (cause we've been in such denial for so long we don't even know where the pain comes from) and this may be scripture, a truth spoken in love by a good friend or random stranger, the power of the Holy Spirit or whatever. and then, when we feel like the air is escaping and we are broken forever, he repairs. like there was never a puncture in the first place.

and we are restored. don't you just love Him for that?

Ok...what do i do now?

A friend asked me the other day why i don't have a blog. It was such an arb question i stumbled over an answer. And then i figured well most people i know have one, and they don't all have something profound or life changing to say, so why not give it a go. So here's the first random entry. Hope it gets better from here... :)